depressive person, an individual given to the emotional state of depression, you have a battle to fight every day. You can win, but it is not the kind of win where the enemy is defeated and you can dance happily through La La Land for the rest of your days. The battle must be won over and over and over. A depressing thought, I know.
I am a depressive individual. That doesn't mean that I am deeply and clinically depressed all of the time. In that I am fortunate. It means that my mode of coping with some of the bumps in the road of life is to shut down my feelings. This tends to have a spiraling effect. When depressed I loose motivation and over time lose interest in most of the things in life that can bring joy. This leads to shutting down even more.
For someone seriously ill with depression there can be a decline in health, and a tendency to just stay in bed. Why get up? It is just not worth the effort. Whatever you do will lead to bad feelings, and who needs that?
Why do people get depressed? Some might be emotional habit. Much might have to do with heredity. Depression runs in families, and quite likely has to do with genes and the stresses of depressive family lifestyle.
What worked for me during the times when depression threatened to drag me down? The best advice I ever got was to "do something." Don't let the depression back you into a corner. Choose something to do, and do it until it is done. Small steps at first, but bigger ones can follow as the muscles of the will are stretched and coping skills are developed.
It is important to allow yourself to feel bad, as well. The urge to hide from bad feelings is at the root of depression. Numbness is the goal. Non-feeling. Good feelings are often fleeting. Bad feelings can linger, especially if they are linked to conditions in your life that seem impossible to improve. That need for numbness is often the root of the appetite for drugs, or excessive eating, or any number of other bad behaviors. Working through bad feelings is a skill that must be learned through practice.
Depressives often can be angry. Not just angry at something in particular. Generally angry. Mad all of the time, but at what they cannot say. Anger is an emotion easily achieve. There is some strange satisfaction in being angry. It is almost like happiness, but much more easily reached. Unfortunately, it will drain the life from you. Anger must be accepted, and mastered.
Action can help with the anger, and with managing the bad behaviors acquired to poorly manage the depression. Do things. Set a goal. I wrote a novel as my exercise. Day by day I added words and built a story. For someone else it could be making something. Woodworking. Knitting. Gardening. One of the best tools is helping other people. Engaging in life. Getting involved.
For the severely depressed, medication may be necessary. Counseling can also be a useful tool, and a good counselor can help with selecting and managing medications. Professionals are best, including many pastors and priests. Sometimes a very good friend can be an aid. The kind of friend who can help you move toward winning, not the kind who will help you justify bad depressive behaviors. Someone who can kick you in the butt, when necessary. A real friend.
Finding help and resources such as books and videos can be one of the somethings you do. Do something.
Victory can come only if you want to win. If you are satisfied in the numbness and the anger and endless justifications, you might not be ready to win against depression. If you are tired of being tired and needlessly angry and seldom finding joy in your life, you might be ready to begin the battle you will fight every day. One day at a time, you can win against depression.
Do something. Read up on the condition. Seek assistance, whether from your doctor or a community program or a support group. Take action, now. Take action, every day.
Cruise to nowhere, and a salty cocktail hour
12 hours ago