I do not trust my government-

It's true. I do not trust the government of the United States of America. Oh, I love my country. I served my country with pride. I have a special love for my brothers and sisters in arms, serving now and in the past. I love the ideals of America and I love the American people. I do not, however, trust the government.

I do not trust the governments of other countries, either. Indeed, I trust most of them far less than I trust my own government. However, I still don't trust my own government.

When I was growing up my government was drafting young men and sending them off to a foreign land to do military adventuring for reasons I still do not understand. Oh, there are a lot of reasons offered, but none of them mean anything to me. I grew up believing that my government wanted to send me away to die. I just did not find that to be a good relationship builder.

In spite of that I joined the Army even during the Vietnam Conflict. I did that largely to protect myself, but I was also proud to serve. You see, in those days they offered "guarantees" regarding training and assignments. I joined the part of the Army that dealt with nuclear weapons. Unfortunately, due to some personal flaws and tactical errors I never finished the nuke training. I ended up in supply. Supply people could go anywhere.

I was not disappointed when my tour took me to Germany. Not that such a situation was safe. It was not uncommon for a soldier to go to a non-combat assignment for a year or so and be then sent to combat to serve their last year. Vietnam could still have been my future. However, we finally decided that we had done enough of whatever we were doing there and got out of Vietnam. Before I had to go there.

As I said, I don't mind.

In those days you served a single tour in combat during an enlistment. That is all that was required. That is all they needed, because they were constantly drafting young men to throw into the mill. Lots of post traumatic stress to go around.

Today they keep sending soldiers back into the mill. No draft to refresh the pool. They grind them fine, these modern warriors. Men and women. Rather than screwing up a lot of people they just focus on screwing up a smaller number but being sure they are thoroughly ruined. Then they neglect them and throw money into protracting another set of wars that don't seem to be accomplishing anything.

Did I mention I don't trust my government? Can you imagine why I don't?

I recall a movie in which a character said, "Justice is the ideal. The law is what we live with." America, the Constitutional America, the Bill of Rights America, is the ideal. The government in whatever perverted form it happens to take is what we live with.

I love America. I even love our government. I just cannot trust that government. I am not convinced that they (those who govern) have my interests and the interests of my family at heart. I am confident I can survive their incompetence and corruption, but that is not trust. That is faith in myself and my capacity to survive. I would rather they be my partners and we could work together toward a brighter future.

Too much of what politicians do is just to seem like they are my friends. If they look right, they must be right, right? Con-men like to get you thinking the same way.

Secret wars, misrepresented wars, hidden agendas, and bridges built to nowhere are not the keys to my cynical heart. Keep in mind, previous generations of these current political creatures wanted to send me off to kill and die in a foreign land. Perhaps such are the ways things must be done in this world. If so, I will leave it to them to do it. I don't want that world.

It is probably too late for me. I may not be winnable, as a true believer in any political entity. I am probably not worth the winning, anyway. Uncompromising people of high ideals don't involve themselves in politics. Perhaps they can't. Fish don't fly (at least very far) for a reason. I have been lied to too long and too often to join the camp of some new pretender.

Still, I love America. Even an America that gives vast wealth to rich bastards who ruin the economy with their piracy, spends a fortune on blowing up a part of the world that already looks like it has been blown up, and rejoices in the pitiful projects that become necessary to take care of the broken veterans who were sacrificed to the machine, because the wealth is still being given to bastards and bombs.

God bless America. She needs it.